


Cure For Loneliness

by JessieCade



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Episode: s01e19 Rose's Room, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Rose's Room
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-07-25 01:42:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20024470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessieCade/pseuds/JessieCade
Summary: Steven's been experiencing depression since becoming a teenager, but especially due to everything that's happened. He realizes, though, that he's not alone in what he's going through.





	Cure For Loneliness

Steven held his breath and peered up at the pink sky, his eyes growing heavier and heavier. Despite the discomfort of having to hold his breath, he found his solace on that little hill in Lion's mane and, for once, his mind was peacefully empty.

For the last week, he's been going solo. He had told the gems that "he needed some time alone- some time to think about things. I'm okay, I swear!" with a small smile, an indication that he couldn't possibly be lying. They trusted him, knowing he needed to process things sometimes, after all he was still young.

During the week, though, he went from seeming okay to seeming sicker and… sadder. Much more quiet.

When Steven came out for air to cure his burning lungs, he could hear whispering coming from below him. Quietly, he stepped out of Lion's mane and looked over the edge of his room to see the gems and his father huddled around the couch and coffee table. This only made his breathing a bit more shallow.

"I don't think I've seen him smile in a few days-"

"Nuh uh! I made him laugh yesterday!"

"Yes but that wasn't a real smile- can't you tell the difference?"

He couldn't tear away from the conversation. He thought he was fine- sure, he hasn't been as happy as usual, but he was _fine_. 

As they talked, it was what his dad said that really set him off.

"Guys, Steven's a teenager now. He's gonna be a little hormonal. I know I sure was."

_Hormonal?_ Steven thought, _I'm not hormonal!_

As quickly and as quietly as he could, Steven hurried off of his ladder and ran to the gem door at the far end of the temple. As if by instinct, the temple opened Rose's room and he stepped inside, ignoring the gasps and Pearl's call of his name.

Inside of his mother's room, there was complete silence. The light pink hue of his surrounding paired with the floating, fluffy clouds called for serenity, but he knew exactly what he needed.

"Room! Uh… I want you to look like the inside of Lion's mane! ...please."

He blinked, and suddenly he was there standing in the soft fur and witnessing the tree swaying in the breeze. This time, though, he could breathe.

Approaching the hill, he looked around and familiarized himself with everything. The chest, the shirt, the sword, the flag- it was all there, and he was alone.

He could probably stay there forever.

He thought about that for a while. How he could stop going out on missions to save the world, how he could finally catch up on some sleep and just take care of himself for once.

_But what about the gems? Dad, Connie, Onion- they'd miss me, I couldn't just leave them like this!_

He sighed and shook his head, drawing in deep breaths to keep himself relaxed. All week he's been consumed by troubling thoughts and weariness-

Depression.

He hadn't realized he had fallen asleep until he woke up and felt drool on his cheek. Sitting up, he rubbed it off then rubbed his eyes, looking around to see where he was. He felt content, at ease. 

But how long could he take this?

Alone time could be good, but too much could be dangerous. Detrimental.

"Room! I want to see my mom."

It had been years since he'd talked to her the last time (through the rooms version of her of course). At that moment, though, he didn't want anyone real but he also just…

Needed his mom.

Rose was suddenly next to him, leaning against the base of the tree as he did. They were both quiet a while, Steven trying to find the right words, but when Rose set her hand in the grass he crawled closer and leaned against her.

"I don't know what to do," he started, feeling emotion arise within him, "I feel… alone… I know the gems are here, and Connie, but… I don't know…"

Gently, she pet his hair. "It can be hard to talk to the people you love about things… In fear of making them mad or sad…"

He nodded, feeling tears well in his eyes. That's what he needed: not advice, but some understanding. Someone to listen and not compare their troubles to his.

"But if you don't talk about how you feel… you'll feel alone when you really aren't… I'm so proud of how far you've come, Steven," she said, making him look up at her with tears streaming down his face, "and so are they. They love you so much."

A son left him right then, and then another and then another until finally he was a Mess of wails in her lap. That was just what he needed to get out of his numbness, this funk- a long, hard cry. To just let it all out instead of holding it in.

When he was finally done, he wrapped his arms around Rose and buried his face in her hair, letting himself find comfort in the rooms canvas. If that was the closest thing to hugging his mother than so be it.

After calming down and catching his breath, Steven found himself standing alone once again. The breeze in the leafs were the only sound around, and for a moment he had converted back to his thoughts of loneliness before deciding to leave the room.

When he did, he found that the temple was empty. Or, seemed empty. Instinctively he headed straight for his room where he discovered that even Lion was missing.

Anxiety began to bubble in his stomach. Had he really upset them that much that they had to leave? Did they go on another mission? 

That's when he heard voices outside. Quietly he stalked under the window, hearing Garnet talking Greg on the front porch.

"I'm not gonna lose him, am I? Steven's never acted like this before, what if he stays like this forever?"

Steven swallowed. He hadn't realized how much he had worried everyone, especially his dad.

"I'm sure Steven will be okay," Garnet assured him, her voice as gentle as always, "he's been through a lot and always come back. He's just been having a hard time, but that's okay. Trust him."

Silence for a moment, then on impulse Steven slowly walked out the front door to face them. Greg tensed, not expecting this, and though Garnet seemed neutral she truly had not expected him to walk out, either.

"Dad…" Steven managed, his cheeks lighting up just before he dove in for a hug. Greg looked at Garnet unsurely, surprised, before hugging back his son and squeezing him tightly.

"Steven…" he hummed, smiling with relief. 

"I'm sorry I haven't been… me… I've been quiet, a-and tired, and-"

"Steven!" Greg said, making him stop and look at him. "It's okay, bud! I understand you needed some time. I just hope you know I'm here for you. We all are."

At that moment, Steven looked around to see that Pearl and Amethyst had appeared on the steps next to him and we're smiling nervously. He couldn't help the tears that arose again and he sniffled, a smile finding its way on his lips, too.

"I love you guys so much."


End file.
